It’s no secret I enjoy reading, writing, and talking about love, marriage and relationships. I recently read a very interesting book by Terrence Real titled The New Rules of Marriage for making love work in the 21st century. For today’s topic, I picked 13 of the many “relationship rules” described in this book to share with you for your thoughts:
- Intimacy occurs when 2 or more mature individuals choose to share themselves with one another.
- One of the great paradoxes of intimacy is that in order to have a healthy, passionate relationship, you must be willing to risk it.
- Objective Reality has no place in close personal relationships.
- A good relationship is not one in which the raw parts of ourselves are avoided. A good relationship is one in which they are handled. And a great relationship is one in which they are healed.
- The difference between acceptance and withdrawal is resentment.
- Couples don’t have problems; they are problems.
- You think that your relationship will improve once particular stressful issues, like money, parenting, or sex, “Get Resolved.” But it’s actually the other way around. You’ll be able to successfully tackle tough issues only after your relationship improves.
- Few things diminish one partner’s desire for sex more effectively than the other partner’s demand for it.
- You have no right to complain about not getting what you never asked for.
- Great relationships mean more assertion up front and less resentment on the back end.
- The essential dynamic of all relationships is a dance of harmony, disharmony, and repair.
- Listening equals understanding.
- Understanding builds empathy, empathy builds compassion, and compassion ends combat.
What do you think?
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